Here are some excerpts from songs, poems and books that Doug loved.
From “Taking a Walk with You” by Kenneth Koch
Horwitz and Holden discussing what happens to the ducks and fish in the winter from Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
A Blessing from The Branch Will Not Break by James Wright
Talkin’ World War III Blues by Bob Dylan
“I probably misunderstand misunderstanding itself–I misunderstand the Via Margutta in Rome, or Via della Vite, no matter what street, all of them.
I misunderstand wood in the sense of its relationship to the tree; I
misunderstand people who take one attitude or another about it . . .
Spring I would like to say I understand, but I most probably don’t–
autumn, winter, and summer are all in the same boat…”
From – Taking a Walk with You.
Ahhhh, thank you so much for this section of the memory book. It gives me a glimpse into the fascinating places that Doug went, as you so eloquently described, Justin. I have been trying to find the words to express Doug’s capacity to simultaneously be confident, humble and humorously self-deprecating. I can see and hear him, following a compliment, puff his chest and get that sly impish grin “Well, I suppose I should feel {good, smart}…about that!” and then chuckle. So much will be said, rightly so, about his warmth, kindness, compassion, gentleness, clinical wisdom, etc., but what I basked in when with him was the capacity to not take oneself too seriously. Take our work, our clients, etc., – absolutely – but he reminded me in countless spoken and unspoken ways that it is okay to not know and to find humor and humility in our humanness and foibles. I can so see why Doug loved this poem. Fittingly, my last hours with him were spent walking about Kalamazoo in the evening hours, trying to find a restaurant that served dinner after 10:00. Upon reflection, one of the best walks of my life. I will cherish this poem (or my misunderstanding of it) as a way to keep Doug on my shoulder. Life without him is unimaginable but this poem will make it a bit more bearable.
Tobi, Aaron, Justin, Elizabeth, Laurel, Hannah, Hayden and Sage – you are carried in my thoughts and heart during this incredibly sorrowful time. I hope the memories that will be shared on this website will comfort and sustain you.
Love,
Julie